by Dear Abby: My wife and I went seven months ago for our annual checks. We were both overweight and told by our respective doctors that we had to make some lifestyle changes to improve our health. Since that time I have made the necessary changes. As a result, I have lost 40 pounds and all my vitals are in a healthy reach.
My wife has not made any changes. There has been no weight loss and she must use medication for a few problems. Although I have made sacrifices, she has apologized. I love her a lot, but I am very frustrated. I have been positive and encouraging, but it doesn’t seem to help.
We are both at an age when we have to take our health seriously. This is not about appearance or appearance; It’s about health. I really want us to have a long and healthy life together. If there is advice you can give, I am open to hear it. – Fitter in Indiana
Dear fitter: Apart from modeling healthy exercise and eating habits for your wife, there is nothing that you can do to force her from the process she deals with. Changing someone’s lifestyle (or not) is a personal choice. Motivation must come from the inside and she must be determined to make the effort. Her doctor, not you, should discuss that those changes with her and the reasons for that are. Even small changes can make a big difference.
Dear Abby: I have a 7-year-old great-granddaughter, “Emma.” She is beautiful, smart, happy and just great. Her father, my grandson and her mother are no longer together, but they share custody. My grandson has since met with Baby Mama No. 2 and has two other children with her.
Emma’s life is not the easiest because of the fighting and disagreements. Her mother is also with another man and has other children. Her mother’s boyfriend is not nice for Emma. My grandson tries to get her full custody about her.
Emma is clear and intelligent. I would like to talk to her about independence and not dependent on a man to support her. I know she is still too young at 7 o’clock to understand. What is a good age to learn her independence and how they can take care of themselves, and instead of ‘needing’ a man, is it healthier to be with someone without being his? – Her “Gee-Gee” in Colorado
Dear “Gee-Gee”: This is not a one -off lesson that you try to convey. It is a lifelong process. The first thing you have to do is be a role model for Emma. Expare her to books and videos about women who are independent, build career and live for themselves instead of depending on a man. Then learn her self -respect. If you do that, they are lessons that she takes in adulthood.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Please contact Dear Abby at http://www.dearabby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
